Woo hoo! I found it online! I remember when this song came out and was a big hit. At the time it sounded a lot like an Israeli version of Jamiroquai. Clip below, with some of my free translation:

כמה מקסים, אין לי מושג מה עושים”
בתוך העשן מתפתח משהו לא מובן
היא כבר נעלמה - נשארתי בלי חמצן
זה מסוכן, איך לא הייתי מוכן? “

“How charming, I have no idea what to do
In the smoke something not understood develops
She’s already disappeared - I’m alone without oxygen
It’s dangerous, how wasn’t I ready?

From Jew-ish.com music columnist Sarah Shay with regards to this week’s holiday snack food article.

The first time the abbreviation “WFM” (Whole Foods Market) was used, my brain tried to process it as internet shorthand, like WTF or FML. Since it followed the statement that a package of candy cost $2 more just to have a ribbon on it, I decided it must be “What Fucking Moxie!”

*bow

Well played, Ms. Shay.

I consider myself an agnostic, but if you made me choose—God or no God—I’d guess the latter. That said, the Freedom From Religion Foundation‘s recent bus ads really rub me the wrong way. Not just because they’re confrontational—confrontational can be okay. My real problem is that they’re not witty. Check this out:

The ad is a parody of the famous line “Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus,” which a 19th-century newspaper editor wrote to reassure a young girl that St. Nick exists, despite what her more skeptical peers had told her. Though the parallel between God and Santa is an old saw among the anti-religious—both were dreamed up by humans in their desperate search for meaning, goes the logic—the FFRF ad strikes me as smug, which is ironic considering organized religion’s reputation for smugness.

It’s been said before that atheism can and has become a kind of religion in its own right, and the so-called New Atheists (led, arguably, by Richard Dawkins) has brought that notion into clearer focus in the past 10 years or so. I imagine FFRF’s ads and the New Atheist movement are backlash phenomena—reactions to George W. Bush’s religiousness, and the ways in which it affected his governing style. But there is such a thing as overcompensation, and I find the bus ads juvenile and irritating. Yes, their bold contrarianism is refreshing, but I wish the execution were better.

This is one of those stories that makes you feel both good and bad at the same time, if you know what I mean.

It became clear that, despite the fact that she had limped in off the street last month, carting everything she owned, the woman didn’t want a thing; none of the housing assistance or health care that JFS has been providing for years.

“I’m thinking we need to get her to a senior case manager, get her on food stamps or some other assistance,” said John Streimikes, the assessment and intake specialist at JFS’s Capitol Hill office. “She tells me no, she doesn’t need anything.

“She needs help with someone taking her money.”

The woman had a donation for the people of Israel. “God’s people,” she called them. She was doing so in honor of her sister.

Hahahahaha! The Tablet has an absolutely brilliant story about the top 10 Jewish gifts never to buy for anyone ever. It’s written in the style of one of those gift guides that every Jewish publication runs around Hanukkah time and is bitingly funny. My favorite:

Harvey Nagila Dancing Doll

True story. My dad got us this toy when Josie was tiny. Josie took one look at its impassive, sunglassed face and clung to my leg. When Harvey began shimmying to Hava Nagila, she screamed and crawled behind the couch so fast she left skid marks. Harvey sat, unloved, on a shelf for three years until Maxine was born. We took it down again. Because we are stupid. When Harvey began to clap, Maxine let out an inhuman wail, covered her face, and started shaking. She became haunted by it, her own personal dybbuk, and, in a ritualistic fervor that would make Freud proud, insisted on watching it dance over and over, quaking as it scared the bejeezus out of her. Buy Harvey Nagila and you too will know this fun.

Available at Traditions Jewish Gifts, $17.95 plus shipping.

Runner up:

Jewish Major Leaguers Baseball Cards, Collectors Edition

“OMG, Dad, you spent $918 for this?! Why? Why do you expect me to live your dreams? I hate baseball! I just want to dance!”

Available at Amazon.com, $918 plus shipping.