We occasionally have those little hiccups in our little publishing world, when Messianic Jews — the only people we actually try to exclude in our ever inclusive circle — end up invited to something we’re doing. The reason we do that is simple, really — they’re not Jewish. And not only that, they try to recruit people who are Jewish into their fold. They openly evangelize and believe Jesus Christ is the Messiah, meaning, that they are, wait for it… Christian. So imagine my shock, my horror, my… my… my…curiosity when I was having a somewhat Jewish conversation with an old friend of mine (“Are you still Jewish?” “Yup, are you?”) who found me on Facebook and this ad popped up on the side (not the one for the depilatory — if you know me, you know it’s obvious why that one showed up…)
:
So naturally I clicked (and, hence, gave them money. But it’s my only donation ever. I swear it!) and what I found was at once horrifying and just plain ridiculous. Like the games they had for kids, one just like Frogger where you have to help Avi find the “matzo cracker.” They called it just like the other non-Jews in the cafeteria who tried to snake it from you when you were stuck with soggy PB&J since you couldn’t eat bread.
And then they had some other game where you dress and color Avi using the included palette. Not sure what it has to do with Messianism, but I know that since I created this, old Jesus probably ain’t coming for me…

And here’s a little more about the site’s indoctrination scheme, from their About Us page (no charge).

It was a dark and stormy night.. Two Messianic Jewish kids wandered the aisles of a Judaica bookstore looking for Yeshua, confusion all over their faces. “Where´s Yeshua?” they asked store personnel. “My shoes? On my feet, of course!” snorted the clerk behind the counter. They shook their heads sadly. The Christian bookstore didn´t have Yeshua either. Jesus was everywhere, but no one called him by his real name, Yeshua …

WELL WE DO!!

Welcome to Messi Kids, the only place tailored just for kids of the Messianic Jewish faith. Get down and dirty with custom designed duds and toys, print and color bible story pictures, play Messi games and get ready for a kool Kosher chicken named Avi. Finally, Messi Kids is here! Hooray oy vey!

Hooray oy vey indeed.

...but whose cultural identity I am unable to prove via typing their names into the Internets in conjunction with the word “Jewish.”

Aaron Goldman of Throw Me the Statue

Adam Feinstein, director of “Corpses: Sleepytime Gorilla Museum” screening as part of One Reel’s “Picture & Sound: Music Videos”

Jasmine Zimmerman, creator of “Bottle House” art installation

That’s all.

For the whole shebang, go here.

Throw Me the Statue: still awesome, even if not Jewish

Today in the Forward:

Olmert Accuser Faces FBI Probe Into Allegations of Money Laundering

Something about people who live in glass houses comes to mind, although it does make things easier when crooked people just go ahead and out one another.

Well… it appears I am somewhere around an 1/8th Jewish - if you want to be technical about it.
Yes, the news from the great Fankhauser/Funkhouser reunion has reached home, and now I feel I could be filler in Adam Sandler’s ‘Chanukah Song’. The joy.

But what does it mean to be partially Jewish? I haven’t a clue. I don’t even feel like it’s my right to ask… should I be this interested? Do I wear a kilt because I’m a quarter Scottish? I’m a quarter Swiss but I don’t make pocket knives or particularly like chocolate…
While It is always fascinating to learn about your roots, ultimately, heritage and beliefs are learned. I realize my family has done away with their Jewish heritage for some time, having failed to keep it alive. This new found puzzle piece to my family history feels important, but part of me also feels that exhuming these connections would seem… forced.

Don’t get me wrong, I do wish I had a Jewish heritage, and a Scottish and Swiss heritage for that matter. Feeling some connection to that lineage would allow me to pass on some decent culture to any offspring lurking for me in the future. But as it stands now, as with many other Americans, my heritage comes in fractions of the whole without context or substance.

Yesterday my dad sent me an email. It said:

Leyna ... Youngsters of Zion is very good.  Would be nice to see pics of the people you write about. Does that work in your web template? Dad.

Tragically, I’m not tech. savvy enough to figure out how to put up multiple pictures for one story…but that man’s right, when you read about someone, it’s nice to see what they look like. So here are this month’s Youngster’s of Zion.

Jeremy Greenberg, author of “Relative Discomfort”

Jonathan Clarren, master of numerous art forms.

Annie Silverstein (right), co-founder of Longhouse Media, with Tracy Rector, poet John Trudell, and the three teen filmmakers of March Point.